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Josh

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Reefers come from all walks of life and we celebrate them all - cultures, sexes, genders and races (but not hateful stuff, if you are going to be hateful, this is not the place for you).

We don’t think that this needs to be said, but sadly, sometimes it needs to be said blatantly. If you are a man, woman, LGBTQ+ and keep a reef, we respect you enough that if you want to share who you are, we are happy to celebrate you. Thanks for being here!

:geek:
 
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Josh

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I'd appreciate it if someone can create a basic set of rules and guides for tolerance. We can add it to the first sticky thread here.
 

ichthyogeek

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I'd appreciate it if someone can create a basic set of rules and guides for tolerance. We can add it to the first sticky thread here.
Hmmm....well to start, a sticky thread would be useful explaining some stuff.

For example, some things I've seen include "well why are you being so exclusive and forming your own club", or "why do you even need your own space". A "Why we have this subforum" explanation sticky could be quite useful. I've not been on this forum long enough to know if it's even necessary, but it's really tiring having to repeat myself on other forums.

Aside from that, a general "no anti-isms [sexism, racism, shouldn't be allowed, feminism is something I'd like to see allowed] or -phobias [homophobia, transphobia, shouldn't be allowed ]" rule could be nice.

Keeping the rules flexible should probably be necessitated. A lot of stuff is probably going to be overhauled sooner or later, and keeping the rules flexible (adding, changing, and removing as necessary) will allow for flexibility.

I would ideally like to see reefs.com stay as predominantly reefs oriented, but maintain that this be a place for LGBTQ+ individuals to recognize that, yes, in fact, there are queer reefers. I honestly would have been just as happy with a thread.

I'm not really sure how to navigate the "well intentioned but uninformed" users vs. the "I know exactly what buttons I'm pressing" users when questions that can definitely be read as offensive are made though. I've definitely been in the first boat (well intentioned but REALLY stupid), and would hate to alienate people in that boat. At the same time...trolls are trolls are trolls....
 

evoIX_Reefer

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Please add why this sub-forum even needed. Was there an incident? I dont get the exclusivity of this sub-forum to feel special?

Is there Hey I am Straight in Reefing?

Is there LGBTQ fish?

Maybe there is new genders in fish?

Why are we identifying fish as only male or female? Why dont they have a say?

I dont care what your preferences are but it is quite annoying to provide "special" sub-forums for what exactly?

This could be in a non-reef thread or in general reefing sub-forum instead of its own sub-forum and noone would go in bashing or questioning anything.
 

Tal Sweet

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Please add why this sub-forum even needed. Was there an incident? I dont get the exclusivity of this sub-forum to feel special?

Is there Hey I am Straight in Reefing?

Is there LGBTQ fish?

Maybe there is new genders in fish?

Why are we identifying fish as only male or female? Why dont they have a say?

I dont care what your preferences are but it is quite annoying to provide "special" sub-forums for what exactly?

This could be in a non-reef thread or in general reefing sub-forum instead of its own sub-forum and noone would go in bashing or questioning anything.
First off, it's not a "preference". Second, I think this covers it: https://reefs.com/magazine/dad-i-think-i-might-be/
 

ichthyogeek

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Please add why this sub-forum even needed. Was there an incident? I dont get the exclusivity of this sub-forum to feel special?

Is there Hey I am Straight in Reefing?

Is there LGBTQ fish?

Maybe there is new genders in fish?

Why are we identifying fish as only male or female? Why dont they have a say?

I dont care what your preferences are but it is quite annoying to provide "special" sub-forums for what exactly?

This could be in a non-reef thread or in general reefing sub-forum instead of its own sub-forum and noone would go in bashing or questioning anything.
Yes there was an incident. Not on this forum (to the best of my knowledge), but it was on the internet. That should be enough of a hint to get you started (fairly recent, I'm definitely still angry about it).

No, Yes, actually yes, because gender is a social construct, see above answer, is there even a non-reef forum here? I'm looking to see if there's an introduction forum but can't find anything.
 

Josh

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@Tal Sweet Can you please compile the suggestions for an intro post that will include the rules for the forum? I will add it as an announcement once we agree on it.
 

A4edwin

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I think respect for for everyone no matter what you identify as or sexual preference you have or even what race you are should just be a rule. Everyone should be treated with decency and respect. What is the point of an lgbtq+ sub forum?
 

Michelle Lemech

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Please add why this sub-forum even needed. Was there an incident? I dont get the exclusivity of this sub-forum to feel special?

Is there Hey I am Straight in Reefing?

Is there LGBTQ fish?

Maybe there is new genders in fish?

Why are we identifying fish as only male or female? Why dont they have a say?

I dont care what your preferences are but it is quite annoying to provide "special" sub-forums for what exactly?

This could be in a non-reef thread or in general reefing sub-forum instead of its own sub-forum and noone would go in bashing or questioning anything.
Please add why this sub-forum even needed. Was there an incident? I dont get the exclusivity of this sub-forum to feel special?
Is there Hey I am Straight in Reefing?

Is there LGBTQ fish?

Maybe there is new genders in fish?

Why are we identifying fish as only male or female? Why dont they have a say?

I dont care what your preferences are but it is quite annoying to provide "special" sub-forums for what exactly?

This could be in a non-reef thread or in general reefing sub-forum instead of its own sub-forum and noone would go in bashing or questioning anythin
Please add why this sub-forum even needed. Was there an incident? I dont get the exclusivity of this sub-forum to feel special?

Is there Hey I am Straight in Reefing?

Is there LGBTQ fish?

Maybe there is new genders in fish?

Why are we identifying fish as only male or female? Why dont they have a say?

I dont care what your preferences are but it is quite annoying to provide "special" sub-forums for what exactly?

This could be in a non-reef thread or in general reefing sub-forum instead of its own sub-forum and noone would go in bashing or questioning anything.
How does this hurt you that there is a sub forum? Why does it (to quote you) “annoy” you that there is a (again, quoting you) “special” LBGTQ+ sub forum? There’s also a sub forum for women. You haven’t posted there asking similar questions. You may want to think about why that is. You also may want to think about the privilege you carry around as a cis male. How do I know you’re a cis male? Because if you weren’t, you wouldn’t be asking such questions.
 

ichthyogeek

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I think respect for for everyone no matter what you identify as or sexual preference you have or even what race you are should just be a rule. Everyone should be treated with decency and respect. What is the point of an lgbtq+ sub forum?
I honestly would have been happy with just a thread. I'm not really sure what the point of a sub forum is (aside from visibility), but that doesn't mean I'm not happy (aka, I'm actually ecstatic) about this. At the very least, it makes me feel welcome and that I have a place to go to, as opposed to quitting another forum and being lost yet again.
 

Thales

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I think respect for for everyone no matter what you identify as or sexual preference you have or even what race you are should just be a rule. Everyone should be treated with decency and respect. What is the point of an lgbtq+ sub forum?
Because everyone in not treated with decency and respect, quite the opposite. Just like any speciality forum, if this one isn't fo you, no need to check it out. Thanks
 


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