Love, lust, and relationships

[DRZL]

a few questions i need answered before i can comment:

- drzl - are you married?
- would you say this girl is equally your league, below your league or out of your league? be honest

lolol...no im not married, im 20 yrs old for gods sake!

Yea shes in my league, lol, im not an ugly guy if thats what you mean. I think the reason I'm having a hard time is because ive been used to girls liking me before I do . May sound assinine but its the truth, scouts honor.

Shes different, and im having a feeling its because she might of been hurt before. 2nd day into class we were talking about trust (sociology class) and she said she didnt trust anybody other than her parents.hmmm.....im no Dr. Phil but I feel thats a flag, also when I talked to her, she told me she worked at a hooters type sports bar. Im sure shes had her fair share of chumps trying to get at her.

Hmmm...what do you think?

 

[DRZL]

on another note, i think you should be frank about what you feel.seems like you've known this girl for a while so there really is no need to beat around the bush. i think after you've known a girl for a bit your gut feeling is usually right on wether she likes you or not. ask her out on a date, stay confident, and when the time seems right tell her what's on your mind.if she digs you cool, if not you just go and find yourself another fish (not literally).

Im having a hard time w/ a particular girl that im starting to like/lust in my school. I actually did something that is very unlike me and took the initiative and called her and upfront told her im interested in getting to know her. She said OK....OK.....OK, I said OK (pause) well I g2g bye. Since then Ive talked to her and she seems to be normal then turn cold.

Its not like I havent had some signals from this girl, (She came up to me 1st while in my car and spoke to me, says hi and bye only to me in our class, she asked me to sit w/ her and we talked several times, made one of those eye contacts that actually made her forget what she was saying) all intermittent w/ days she wouldnt even acknowledge me, and she would bolt out of class.

So either she has explosive diahrrea all the time, or shes playin games, either one to me are just as bad.

Keep in mind, ive never really been the one to chase, and ive been in a long term relationship for 4 yrs

So my fellow reefers what do ya think?

now im gonna sound like a naggin girl,

"YOU NEVER LISTEN TO WHAT IM SAYIN!"

lol...I have told her but I think shes never had someone tell her this upfront, for now im still perplexed by her but if **** continues uneventful, she will be X-ed. Its just that when I want something or someone, I dont want to not get it.

Also this isnt explicitly to "wam bam thank you ma'am" Im really interested to see what shes about, if she turns out to be a **** for brains then maybe it can be a fling but it depends on her

 

[DEEPWATER]

YO D ,,WTF ,,,are you a man or a mouse ,,,just go up to her and ask ,what you never got turned down before ,if she likes cool ,,if not ,,move on bro ,you are young ,getting your life together ,and it winter ,you need to stay warm ,JKING ,,maybe not ,
but for real ,just do it ,go for it ,ask her what the hell is up ,nothing to it ,then you know whats uo and move with or with out her ,,

 

[DEEPWATER]

Oh Yeah ,,3 things that you should run after a girl ,

1 ,,if you are getting laid ,
2 if she is rich ,
3 ,if sheis the one you want to marry ,

if she does not fall in the above cats,,,then bye bye

 

[jhale]

as the reef turns...

this will make it on my top ten things I love about MR.

could it be you want her because she is not as available as you would like her to be?

from what you said she does not sound like someone who is going to be easy to get to know. It could take some time to get her to trust you, so the question is how many lattes, cappuccinos etc. can you sit through? at least you have a class together, that makes it much easier to speak to her.

 

[House of Laughter]

D,

Read my signature bro - she's got a man and is scared of what that will bring - say later for her - you'll see her again, then you play hard to get, and watch her come runnin -

House

 

[shrimpluva]

Oh Yeah ,,3 things that you should run after a girl ,

1 ,,if you are getting laid ,
2 if she is rich ,
3 ,if sheis the one you want to marry ,

if she does not fall in the above cats,,,then bye bye

I hope that was a joke- that is a terrible outlook on relationships, now I am curious, are you still single? If so, maybe you should re-evaluate your criteria.

 

[DEEPWATER]

I hope that was a joke- that is a terrible outlook on relationships, now I am curious, are you still single? If so, maybe you should re-evaluate your criteria.

LOL,,,,dont take toomany thing serious ,,,,I dont come on MR to be serious ,,im serious from 9 to 5 ,,after that ,,all fun ,,
Plus what does being single hav eto do with anything ,,I can tell you one thing ,,NY doesnt have the great choices you know ,,,
Plus how many newly married ppl stay married after a 1 ys or 2 ,,,,,
I would change my criteria if there was a reason too , :knockedou

 

[DEEPWATER]

Oh yeah ,,,,I am single ,By choice ,,Best thing i ever did i my life ,,,is staying single !!!!!

 

[shrimpluva]

Oh yeah ,,,,I am single ,By choice ,,Best thing i ever did i my life ,,,is staying single !!!!!

One day you will meet a girl that will sweep you off your feet and hopefully your outlook will change

 

[shrimpluva]

and by the way the reason i asked if you were still single is because if you were basing a relationship on getting laid or being rich i was curious if you actually found someone based on those things. And even if you did would marrying material actually be a girl who is just about getting laid???

 

[inkblue]

:flirt: can't give advice coz i have enuF probLems with my life, but i always say... do what your heart desires :approve:

 

[alrha]

LOL,,,,dont take toomany thing serious ,,,,I dont come on MR to be serious ,,im serious from 9 to 5 ,,after that ,,all fun ,,
Plus what does being single hav eto do with anything ,,I can tell you one thing ,,NY doesnt have the great choices you know ,,,
Plus how many newly married ppl stay married after a 1 ys or 2 ,,,,,
I would change my criteria if there was a reason too , :knockedou

Um Ronen, Habibi, you posted that at 9:30am, that falls within your serious time.

NY actually does have great choices, with the variety of cultures, it shouldnt be hard finding one you like (in your case, stick to israeli but try to find a good one)

I passed the 2 yr married mark in april, so i guess i beat the odds. It wasnt easy, but its easier than a messy divorce

 

[alrha]

Maybe its the fact, shes Lebanese

dude, i'm lebanese too, so i dont know if that helps, but you must realize that she is likely very traditional (as you mentioned she trusts her parents above anyone else - this is normal).

your best bet would be to either call her up, or when you see her in person, simply ask her if she would like to have dinner with you (no cheaping out on a coffee shop if you really like her). Say something like "i heard of this great restaurant and would love to take you there, how about we try it out this saturday night?" based on her excuse you will then have to evaluate if he is really busy or trying to get away from you. If she is interested she will either say "yes, that sounds nice" or "oh, this week doesnt work for me, but can we do another night/week?"

keep in mind that you must go pick her up when you go on the date and ring the bell (no honking crap). her parents are likely to invite you in and chat you up a few minutes (and perhaps offer you sweets or something) before you head out. It of course goes without saying that you pay for everything during the date.

If this works, you owe me a frag.

 

[DEEPWATER]

I hope that was a joke- that is a terrible outlook on relationships, now I am curious, are you still single? If so, maybe you should re-evaluate your criteria.

ANd bythe way ,,,Welcome to MR ,,

 

[shrimpluva]

I like Alberts advice MUCH better. The truth of the matter is the girl you will fall in love with wont be the type that sleeps with you on the first date. There needs to be something to look foward to and anticipate. Have fun with the dating part there will be plenty of time for sex if the dates go well. You are probly right about the fact that she has been hurt but she must have strong values and you need to earn trust it doesnt come easily these days since most guys just want to get laid. good luck

 

[DEEPWATER]

and by the way the reason i asked if you were still single is because if you were basing a relationship on getting laid or being rich i was curious if you actually found someone based on those things. And even if you did would marrying material actually be a girl who is just about getting laid???

If i was basing my relationship on that i would of been married long time ago ,the reason why im not cuz i dont think of that way ,,
Im old fashion type guy ,not into the BMW ,Lexus ,etc ,,I live a simple life ,happy ,and not missing anything aside from kids ,,reason why i didnt get married is because i missed my calling i guess ,and now the older i get the pickier i get ,Getting to use to being single ,,and believe me or not ,,I like it ,kinda nice in someways ,and not in others . If i do meet the right i wil get married ,but doesn not look like it so single i stay ,,other wise dont take eveything i say seriously ,look at most of my posts ,,i like to joke around
O BTW ,,I didnt see you make a statement about # 3 ,,,If you are going to marry her ,,,why not ,
you only saw ,1 and 2 ,,funny ,, :sgrin:

 

[DEEPWATER]

Shrimpluva ,Im assuming you are a Female ?

 

[DEEPWATER]

LOL,,,,dont take toomany thing serious ,,,,I dont come on MR to be serious ,,im serious from 9 to 5 ,,after that ,,all fun ,,

Al ,,,I like to enjoy the site ,be funny ,make stupid comments ,and learn ,ask question ,,,
just serious most of the day ,I feel you guys are freinds and fam ,so i can act silly ,funny ,studpid ,and still ppl here know who i am , :p

 

[alrha]

Shrimpluva ,Im assuming you are a Female ?

must be, because a guy would either realize you were joking, or realize you were serious :shhh:

Ronen, how old are you? maybe we can set you up with the shrimpluva, but she would have to change her screen name, b/c shrimp aint kosher.

actually, i dont know if marrying another reefer would be a good thing or a bad thing, on the one hand, you dont have to worry about explaining why you spend so much money on the reef when she spends even more, but on the other hand, you run a very big chance of filing for bankruptcy if you dont have a spouse to keep your reef budget in check - after all, who in their right mind would choose to pay the rent/mortgage over upgrading the reef?